Day 11

Yes, I am skipping days. I'll come back to yesterday as well. Wordsworth is rubbing off on me: I am recollecting my thoughts... I am in my room being all academic: actually, I was incredibly confused and frustrated about my research project. Some people just calm you down, and my group leaders, Kerrie and Blair, did just that. I learned something about myself this morning: I have been avoiding some of my project itself because I am not in my comfort zone. As I am sitting in my room thinking that I never really talk about myself to anyone, not my fears that is, I realized something in my research. I have been avoiding a lot of things in my life, such as going back to school, etc.. I have always wanted to, and did two years ago: I accomplished that goal. Now, it is poetry, and perhaps, just little things in general. I've always thought that I would love travel; I've never had the opportunity, so, here I am in a Julia Roberts movie discovering who Candy is. Am I too old to be discovering this now, I ask myself. I have told a couple of people (I am not good at trusting people for some reason) but yes, I am now Julia Roberts in London. I feel so much better having said that aloud. I know that this will change me even more; I changed a lot when my husband went to Afghanistan over a year ago, and I know this is already changing me once again. It is for the better, however. I feel more, well, educated, better able to help students like myself: I deal with others academic problems better than my own, in case you have not noticed. Wordsworth revisited Tintern Abbey in his mind because he felt a release of emotions, just like I felt when I visited Westminster Abbey, and also like I am right now, which is why I am free writing this blog post. His doubts about his particular problems inspired him to be creative in this poem: it was written later; also, "Composed upon Westminster Bridge..." was written as a reflection upon a tranquil London. This has made me realize that his poem, "London,1802," is the one that is dissimilar (for right now, anyway). As I make more self-discoveries, I can unlock these poems as well. I am a picky eater; I am picky at my clothes; I like contemporary modern; I am definitely an English major; I am finding that I like film better than history recently... I am not going to bore you by telling you all about myself, nor will I choose to since I am rather a private person, but this helps myself as well to understand who I am and why I am here. London is fabulous. The United States is fabulous. My travel experiences are certainly influencing each other.